Breaking Free: How to Let Go of Guilt as a Physician

Have you ever looked up and realized you’re living your life more for everyone else than for yourself?

If you’re a physician, chances are you’ve been there. Maybe you’re there right now.

You might feel the pressure to work more hours, to keep up appearances, to stay on a path simply because it’s the one you started. Even when your heart is quietly telling you something else.

This post is about a message many of us need to hear: you don’t owe your life to guilt, to fear, or to other people’s expectations.

Let me share where this journey began for me.

Disclaimer: This article is for informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute financial, legal, or investment advice. Any investment involves risk, and you should consult your financial advisor, attorney, or CPA before making any investment decisions. Past performance is not indicative of future results. The author and associated entities disclaim any liability for loss incurred as a result of the use of this material or its content.

I Started My Blog in Secret

When I first launched Passive Income MD, I didn’t tell anyone.

I wrote anonymously. No name, no photos, no credentials beyond “a doctor in Southern California.” Why? Because I was scared.

I was afraid my colleagues would find out and think I wasn’t dedicated to medicine. I was afraid my family, or worse, my in-laws, would think I had taken a wrong turn. That I was abandoning the profession I had spent so many years training for.

I didn’t want to be judged. But here’s the thing I came to realize. The judgment I feared most wasn’t even from others. It was from myself.

Deep down, I believed that stepping off the traditional path in medicine meant betraying something sacred. That I was failing to live up to what I “should” be doing.

That belief weighed heavily on me.

The Silent Burden We All Carry

So many of us carry that same weight.

We’re afraid to deviate from the path because of guilt and obligation. We tell ourselves things like:

• “You’re wasting your training if you go part-time.”
• “Someone else could have taken your spot in med school.”
• “You owe it to your patients and society to keep going.”

Whether we hear these messages from others or from the inner voice we’ve internalized, they keep us stuck.

They keep us missing our kids’ baseball games.
They keep us nodding “yes” to extra shifts when our hearts say “no.”
They keep us chasing someone else’s version of success until we forget to define our own.

I’ve been there too. For years, I pushed forward on the path I was told would lead to fulfillment, even when something deep inside was telling me to pause, to reassess.

And even when I began cutting back, when I reduced my hours and eventually stepped away from clinical work altogether, that guilt stayed with me.

Until someone said something I’ll never forget:

“No one will remember the overtime you worked. But your kids will.”

That hit me hard. It still does.

Your Time Has Value Beyond Work

That quote forced me to ask myself, who was I living for?

The truth is, I was building my life around what others expected of me, not what I truly wanted.

So I started asking different questions.

• What does my ideal life look like?
• How do I want to spend my time while I still have my health, energy, and family around me?
• Am I giving my best years to a system that doesn’t return that investment?

And slowly, I realized something powerful.

I could still love medicine and not give my entire life to it.

You Don’t Need Permission to Live Intentionally

Once I let go of the need for others’ approval, everything changed.

I stopped asking for permission to say “no.”
I stopped believing that my worth was tied to hours worked or roles played.
I stopped living out of obligation and started living with purpose.

I realized that my version of success wasn’t about what others thought of me. It was about how I felt. How present I was with my kids. How aligned I felt with my values. How fulfilled I was, not just professionally, but personally.

This is the freedom I want for you too.

What If You Allowed Yourself to Want More?

Let me ask you:

• What if it were okay to want more freedom, more presence, or more meaning?
• What if you didn’t have to do the same thing for the next 30 years?
• What if stepping off the path didn’t mean failure, but freedom?

Wanting more for yourself and your family isn’t selfish. It’s honest.

And the people who benefit most from your intentional life? They’re the ones closest to you. Your partner. Your kids. Your future self.

Final Thoughts

I know this reflection may hit close to home. Maybe you’ve been on the edge of a decision – cutting back at work, pivoting your career, starting something new – but guilt keeps you stuck.

I just want to say, you don’t have to keep living that way.

You’re not here to live someone else’s version of success. You’re here to live your own.

And if that means choosing presence over pressure, fulfillment over fear, and meaning over expectation, then you’re on the right path.

Thanks for being part of this community. I see you. I support you. And I hope this gives you permission to start living more intentionally, starting today.

P.S. If you’re looking for tools to create more freedom and choice in your life, check out our upcoming cohort of Passive Real Estate Academy. It’s helped hundreds of physicians take back control, and it might be your next step too.

Were these helpful in any way? Make sure to sign up for the newsletter and join the Passive Income Docs Facebook Group for more physician-tailored content.

Peter Kim, MD is the founder of Passive Income MD, the creator of Passive Real Estate Academy, and offers weekly education through his Monday podcast, the Passive Income MD Podcast. Join our community at the Passive Income Doc Facebook Group.

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